GOLF TOURNAMENTS Ron Fortier

Spring is almost upon us and I have been hard at work arranging this years Golf Tournaments. The

Golf Tournaments are an important part of or Veterans Association as they are always well attended and loads of fun. We have booked two of the three golf courses so far and I am working hard to keep the prices the same as last year which were a really good deal. The tournaments so far will be held as follows:

3.

The Fall Classic for the Vets will be held at River Spirit golf course located just outside the city limits on Highway 8. The date is set for Tuesday, September 14, 2010 with an 1130hr shotgun start. The price is expected to be close to the same as 2009 when it was $100.00. This includes 18 holes of golf, cart, balls, tees and a steak dinner. We have had a lot of great prizes donated and anything you wish to bring will be greatly appreciated by the membership.

I hope to have the details for the Fall Classic shortly, but if I have the date too late for the Spring

Newsletter Edition, I will send everyone an email letting you know where it is and when.

As always, we welcome sponsorship. If anyone can help us out please don’t be shy, please let me know.

Anyone wishing to register can email Ron Fortier at ron1647fortier@shaw.ca . Once the prices for the Tournaments are confirmed additional notification will be sent out.

The Tournaments were well attended last year and everyone had a great time, so be sure to book early to avoid disappointment.

CPA Charity Fall Classic

WHEN:             Wednesday August 25, 2010 – Registration for Morning Tournament 0700, Afternoon Tournament 1300 

WHERE:           River Spirit Golf Club

241555 RR 34 (HWY 8)

COST:              $140* per member per round- WE ACCEPT VISA, MASTERCARD, DEBIT, CHEQUES OR CASH. 

* The fee includes a round of golf, golf cart, meal and numerous prizes 

It will be a Texas Scramble format made up of 4-man teams.  

You can enter in both tournaments.  Please identify which one is your priority in the event the tournament fills as you will only be permitted to play in one in order to accommodate all wishing to attend.  If you want to play in both please state that when registering and if there is room you will be accommodated.  You will receive prizes for both tournaments if participating in both. 

PLEASE REGISTER IMMEDIATELY.   THE AFTERNOON TOURNAMENT FILLED WITHIIN 30 DAYS LAST YEAR.  IT’S FIRST COME FIRST SERVE.   YOU MUST REGISTER AT THE CPA WITH CONNIE OR COREENA AND YOU MUST HAVE FULL PAYMENT.  DO NOT COME OVER AND ATTEMPT TO REGISTER WITHOUT PAYMENT.  NAMES WILL NOT BE TAKEN OVER THE PHONE AND SPACES WILL NOT BE CONFIRMED UNLESS PAYMENT IS RECEIVED.  

If you register and are unable to attend the tournament, you are responsible for filling your spot(s).  No refunds will be given. 

Thanks, 

Board of DirectorsAny questions can be directed to Mike Lomore at 403-836-0076 

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Lady Golfer...

 
Four lawyers in a law firm lived and died for their Saturday morning round of golf. It was their favorite moment of the week. Then one of the lawyers was transferred to an office in another city.

It wasn't quite the same without him. A new woman lawyer joined their law firm, and one day she overheard the remaining three talking about their golf round at the coffee table. Curious, she spoke up, "You know, I used to play on my golf team in college and I was pretty good. Would you mind if I joined you next week?"

The three lawyers looked at each other. They were hesitant because no one wanted to say 'yes', but she had them on the spot Finally, one man said it would be okay, but they would be starting pretty early, at 6:30 am. He figured the early Tee-Time would discourage her immediately.

The woman said this might be a problem, and asked if she could possibly be up to 15 minutes late. They rolled their eyes, but said this would be okay.

She smiled, and said, "Good, then I'll be there either at 6:30 or 6:45."

She showed up right at 6:30, and wound up beating all three of them with an eye-opening 2-under par round. She was a fun and pleasant person the entire round. The guys were impressed! Back in the clubhouse they congratulated her and happily invited her back the next week.

She smiled, and said, "Sure, I'll be here at 6:30 or 6:45." The next week she again showed up at 6:30 Saturday morning. Only this time, she played left-handed. The three lawyers were incredulous as she still managed to beat them with an even par round, despite playing with her off-hand.

By now the guys were totally amazed, but wondered if she was just trying to make them look bad by beating them left-handed They couldn't figure her out.

She was again very pleasant and didn't seem to be showing them up, but each man began to harbor a burning desire to beat her!

In the third week they all had their game faces on. But this week she was 15 minutes late! This had the guys irritable because each was determined to play the best round of golf of his life, to beat her. As they waited for her, they figured her late arrival was some petty gamesmanship on her part. Finally, she showed up. This week the lady lawyer played right-handed, which was a good thing since she narrowly beat all three of them. However, she was so gracious and so complimentary of their stro ng play, it was hard to hold a grudge against her. This woman was a riddle no one could figure out!

Back in the clubhouse she had all three guys shaking their heads at her ability. They had a couple of beers after their round which helped the conversation loosen up. Finally, one of the men could contain his curiosity no longer. He asked her point blank, "How do you decide if you're going to golf right-handed or left-handed?"

The lady blushed, and grinned. She said, "That's easy. When my Dad taught me to play golf, I learned I was ambidextrous. I have always had fun switching back and forth. Then when I met my husband in college and got married, I discovered he always sleeps in the nude. From then on, I developed a silly habit. Right before I left in the morning for golf practice, I would pull the covers off him. If his you-know-what was pointing to the right, I golfed right-handed; if it was pointed to the left, I golfed left-handed.

All the guys on the team thought this was hysterical! Astonished at this bizarre information, one of the guys shot back, "But what if it's pointed straight up in the air?"

She said, "Then, I'm fifteen minutes late!